Monday, July 23, 2012

It should be simple really

I'm hoping someday to find someone who:
  • Really likes kids, probably comes from a big family, has always wanted kids, and can still have them (ideally 2 or 4, or more?)
  • Can appreciate me: that I am cheerful, take good care of myself, can cook, play the piano well, go to church (Unitarian), and am, as a friend of a friend described me, "nerdy and sweet" (it hurts a little, but it is the truth, after all)
  • Also values love, family, and marriage, and maybe even also has suffered being married to someone who didn't
  • Is not self-centered or even a complete narcissist who thinks only of her own feelings and no one else's (see previous point)
  • Is intelligent, curious, spiritual, loving, and looking to continue growing in all of those areas
  • Takes good care of herself
  • Is a girlie-girl, enjoys being a girl and being feminine, and thinks that is a wonderful and natural thing for a woman to be, and to want to be (and understands what a gift that is, and a joy, for her husband)
  • Values complete honesty in her relationship with her life partner and being able to love each other fully as we really are, while also helping, inspiring, and motivating each other to become even better human beings
Extra bonus points for knowing some Spanish (and wanting to learn more), being kind (even to bugs and spiders), and enjoying gardening, camping, and occasionally living abroad (probably in a Spanish-speaking country).

The tough part is finding someone like this who is already local (Olympia, Lacey, Tumwater). Although I have looked farther away in the past, and even given it a good try, it's very difficult to build a real relationship unless you are close to each other.

It is also difficult to find a real relationship in online dating sites, where 85% of the women in their late 30s are "never married" and for about half of those, in my experience, narcissism is the main reason why.

Obviously, not everyone will match my wish list above, but I am hopeful that someday someone will.